At the age of 91, reality is a tough road. Add in a passed husband, a son with Alzheimer’s, many grandchildren who don’t come around and one of the grandsons who does visit, well, he’s dying of kidney failure. So many people understand the importance of organ donation: post-mortem organ donation, that is. But what happens when someone is waiting on the organ donation list for years, attending dialysis three times a week, with no relief in sight? What do people know about live organ donation?
Making the Decision to Become a Kidney Donor
I visited my grandma many times. I am one of two grandchildren who bother to care. She is old and lives alone. However, our family is not close. My cousin, who had been on dialysis for four years, was only a memory in my childhood Christmas dinners when mounds of people would gather for juicy meats, the standard deviled eggs, and separate kids' tables. He was so much older than me that he was at the adult table. I was at the children's table in the other room. Really, I never knew him. We didn’t have the kind of “cousin” relationship that my little ones have with their cousins, who happen to live within a mile radius in either direction of us.
Visiting my grandma one day, all alone in her very empty, lonesome house, years after our Christmas gatherings had ended, she began to cry. Her grandson, my cousin, was going to die. And this was after she lost his mother, her daughter, to cancer when she was my age (albeit, over 35 years ago).
Something pulled, something tugged. I knew that as a responsible, loving person, I should jump up and state “I will make this better for you. For him. For everyone.” But the reality was that I didn’t even know what I was talking about. He was on dialysis for four years. My own family and I didn’t even know it. While that added to the guilt, I knew that I had my family at home to consider. I have two wonderful girls, a wonderful husband and a phenomenal mother. I didn’t want to leave any of them. But I decided to probe.
The Facts on Live Kidney Donation
I spent over a month researching (and as a freelance writer, I have earned the nickname “the researcher,” so I knew what I was doing) live kidney donation. I tried to come up with every possible excuse as to why I shouldn’t give my kidney to my distant cousin. But it wasn’t there.
Statistics show that living donor recipients tend to fare better than post-mortem recipients. There are fewer risks involved because the surgery is now performed through laparoscopic surgery rather than invasively. The remaining kidney grows in size and compensates for the function of the donated kidney. Living donors are statically shown to have just as long of a natural life span as a non-donor, and most importantly, if a living donor requires a donated kidney in the future, they will be given the option to sit at the top of the donation waiting list, which usually requires a minimum of three years of waiting. The donor will receive a complete medical workup and the donor is not required to pay for any testing or the surgery involved with the transplant. And there it was.
I called my grandma and asked her for my cousin’s phone number. When she asked why, I bravely announced, “I want to see if I could donate my kidney to him.” I thought she would die of fear and joy all at the same time.
After numerous trips into downtown Chicago, not only did I overcome my rampant fear of city streets and expressway driving, but I also received the bad news that we were not compatible. That one little ounce in me was slightly relieved, but I held fast to what I wanted to do. In my heart, I knew it was meant to be.
The Surgery Involved in Kidney Donation
A week later, I received a phone call out of the blue. Northwestern Memorial Hospital in Chicago, Illinois, had found another couple who was not compatible. But the four of us would be compatible if we did a cross-donation. According to the Transplant Living Association, one out of every four donors is not compatible. This is the hospital that has performed a multiple of four live kidney donations at one time. I didn’t hesitate. I said yes.
I arrived at the hospital early in the morning, was prepped for my surgery, and woke up sometime later pretty sore. The actual surgery took about an hour more than planned, because it turned out that I was a little odd on the inside and the doctor took a little more time to be careful with my unique layout. After the surgery, I was encouraged to walk, although it was hard. The next morning, I was on my way home. I’ve been in the hospital longer for labor!
The Risks Involved in Being a Live Organ Donor
Some of the questions I was faced with: “Do you understand there are risks involved with surgery?” My response: “Absolutely. But I am the kind of person who understands that everything can have a risk. Every time I get behind the wheel of a car, walk across the street, or eat my husband’s cooking, I’m at risk.”
There is always a risk when having any type of surgery, whether it is minor or major. There are risks involved with anesthesia and infection after the incision. There are possible long-term risks, although they are rare. Complications in surgery may lead to internal bleeding, issues with internal organs or hypertension. In my case, there were no complications, but Northwestern Memorial Hospital was extremely diligent about following up with my care to be sure that there were no problems.
Another major issue can be psychological issues, especially if the recipient does not take to the new kidney. Most kidney transplant locations offer counseling services to help a donor cope before and after a procedure if needed.
The Recovery After a Nephrectomy
The donor does require recovery. When sent home from the hospital, he will be given pain medication and a list of instructions to flow. The donor will have to rebuild stomach muscles because this is where the incision is made. It will be hard to move around for a while, but it is essential to walk as much as possible. This helps speed the recovery.
It was recommended that I take a minimum of four weeks off of work; however, I went back sooner because I had a desk job that did not require lifting. I could not do extensive housecleaning for a short while and was not allowed to drive until I was completely off of the pain medication. For me, that was less than a few days.
Two months later after the phone call from Northwestern Memorial, my cousin and another gentleman, along with his generous daughter who participated in the cross-donation, took a picture together. We became bonded in a way that no one could ever image. Two men walked out of Northwestern Memorial Hospital without the fear of dialysis or death in the near future. And I, a live kidney donor, did not have to push a vacuum for six weeks. Oh, the little luxuries in life!
Please feel free to add comments and share your story if you or a loved one has been touched by a kidney donation either as a donor or a recipient or find out how to become an organ donor.
Renee Holmes - Renee Holmes began her writing career when she was invited to join the Young Authors Club in the first grade. From that point on, writing ...
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